The Bridezilla Syndrome:
Do You Have It? Ten Ways to Avoid all the BS!
By Gina Romanello
Author of Chicken Soup for the Bride's Soul
In a fast-paced world of wedding planning, stress levels are high; immune systems are low; and over the course of the past 20 years, brides have transmitted, what has become a bridal epidemic of our time.
The number of victims has steadily increased; and to date, there is no cure. It's been dubbed various clinical names: Multiple Personality Disorder, Schizophrenia, Temporary Insanity. But in the world of matrimony, anyone who's been exposed - fiancés, family, friends, and victims themselves -- this broadening illness has been commonly termed "Bridezilla Syndrome" or "BS."
A contagious condition, BS has become more prominent and has plagued today's busy, wedding-planning woman. In a preliminary study, the disease has spread at an alarming rate. Symptoms of victims of BS -- better known as Bridezillas -- include reoccurring mood spells, bouts with selfishness, signs of controlling behavior and feelings of meticulousness. Unfortunately fiancés, bridal party members, friends and family eventually fall victim to the actions and attitudes of a Bridezilla.
Research suggests that symptoms are recognized most often by the fiancé and Maid of Honor, and are completely undetectable by the actual victim. In some cases, a bridal party member, who having had too much alcohol to drink, confronted the Bridezilla. Most often, an emotional, breakdown of the victim would follow, thus intensifying her condition. In a survey of 100 Maids of Honor, an alarming 85% said they avoided confrontation with the victim for fear it would only exasperate the illness.
So we must ask the underlying questions: Where is all this BS coming from? How does one know when she's full of it?
Unfortunately the source has not been found; though it is believed that it has existed since the dawn of the institution of marriage. A short-term condition (symptoms persist about 1-2 years depending on one's wedding date), Bridezillas seem to have been unfairly blamed for their actions, for which some believe they have no control, albeit their control over everything else. In fact, it's been clinically proven that a Bridezilla actually does have feelings -- feelings of selfishness, insecurity, anxiousness and stress!
Though it's been said there is no cure, there are ways to prevent infection of BS. A survey of healthy brides, whom successfully planned their weddings without contracting the disease, was conducted. Results showed commonalities of the actions performed to avoid the disorder. Doctors, psychologists and wedding planners strongly suggest the following preventative therapy:
ü Keep Perspective - remind yourself that the wedding is only one day in your life. When things get out of control, close your eyes and remember the reason why you are planning this wedding in the first place.
ü Don't Assume Your Groom Doesn't Want to Help - ask him what he'd like to take responsibility for; and then let him. (note: some grooms may follow the cliché and decline this offer.)
ü Know That You Can't Control Everything - realize this and accept it!
ü Delegate. Delegate. Delegate - If you act like you can handle everything, people will let you. Spread the duties.
ü Don't Sweat the Small Stuff - people won't remember whether or not your invitations had those cute little tissues enclosed.
ü Treat The People You Cherish with Love - the wedding is one day; your family and friends are forever.
ü Allow Others to Vent - give your fiancé, family and bridesmaids permission to tell you when you're going off the deep-end.
ü Take the Heat - give yourself permission to hear them.
ü Do Something for Yourself Every Day - the catch is that it must not involve the wedding.
ü No Wedding Talk After 10pm.
Although preventative therapy is available, some brides inherently fall victim and still contract BS. But there is hope! This is not a terminal illness. In fact in most cases, the bride has been known to be miraculously cured once she has returned from her honeymoon. Doctors and psychologists theorize that the change in altitude from flying coupled with excessive levels of the love hormone, Oxytocin counteracts the disease by boosting the immune system, thus eliminating symptoms.
In cases of remission, the disease has been known to resurface when a person, under certain circumstances, may be planning her wedding again. According to research, those brides with a higher IQ score avoided the reoccurrence of symptoms by simply eloping.
Whatever your situation, whether a Bridezilla, fiancé, friend or family member of one -- join in the fight! With love, hope and education, our brides of the future and their bridal parties will have a winning chance against all the BS!
Footnote: Preventative Therapy of Bridezilla Syndrome provided by www.WeddingQuestions.com.
Chicken Soup for the Bride's Soul NOW available at all bookstores and at discount online at amazon.com.
THE PERFECT WEDDING BEGINS WITH INSPIRATION! Romantic, humorous, touching and true. This books brings to light the true meaning of love and commitment, whether you are newly engaged, recently married or reflecting on the years of married bliss. Makes the perfect bridal shower gift!
Visit www.bridesoul.com for more information about Chicken Soup for the Bride's Soul.
>Read Six Full Stories From The Book!!
>Read Excerpts Of Other Stories From The Book!