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Marriage Counseling Tips: 7 Ways to Handle Conflict in Marriage
How do you handle arguments that lead to heated exchanges with your spouse? Do you value being right over preserving the quality of your relationship? And how long do you stay angry after you've had a fight?
How you answer these questions offers a clue into how secure your marriage is. Unfortunately, too many married couples let unbridled confrontations tear the fabric of their relationship.
Every couple has misunderstandings, miscommunication, and disagreements. It's human nature to see things from your own viewpoint. And it's easy to forget that your spouse's viewpoint is just as valid as yours.
Here are some tips when preparing for talks about emotional issues with your partner:
1. Take time to center yourself emotionally by sitting quietly for a few minutes. You might take deep belly breaths and count your out-breaths to keep yourself focused in the present moment, or you might meditate or pray during this time.
2. Notice any negative "chatter" in your mind and replace it with a positive statement, such as "Each time I really focus on listening intently to my spouse instead of jumping in to criticize, I'm improving our working relationship." Or "I know that we can resolve this problem about how to handle our difficulties."
3. Expect to be able to get along, talk respectfully and courteously to each other, and find creative solutions to problems. You influence what happens in interactions with others by your expectations about what you think will happen. In other words, you often get what you expect.
4. Suspend judgment and criticism so that you're prepared to really hear your spouse. Resolve to listen deeply so that you can understand the fears and concerns that are layered beneath her (or his) surface words. When you can identify and understand her deeper concerns, you're more likely to find an acceptable solution.
5. Make sure that you speak to your spouse with words that are respectful. Avoid profanity and refrain from personal attacks on your spouse. It's quite different to say "I really don't understand what you're saying. Can you please explain?" instead of "This sounds like another one of your idiotic ideas."
6. Be willing to look at your own position and admit it whenever you are wrong. This takes humility and critical self evaluation. But it will buy goodwill with your spouse. And it could set an example that he (or she) may decide to emulate.
7. Don't carry around resentment after an argument. Try to respectfully express your feelings and then let them go. Then try to reestablish closeness as soon as possible. Make an effort to make up by focusing on what you do agree on, and on what you like about your spouse.
Lee Hefner is the co-author of Keep Your Marriage: What to Do When Your Spouse Says "I don't love you anymore!" This e-book is available at http://www.KeepYourMarriage.com. You can also sign up for the free Keep Your Marriage Internet Magazine to get weekly ideas and support to help you save your marriage.
Wedding Planning: Tips for Choosing Online Wedding Vendors
If you're looking to the internet for help with your wedding plans, you're sure to benefit from the wealth of organizational and comprehensive wedding tips, ideas, tools and resources available right at your fingertips! The internet is packed with useful websites, as well as online stores offering every wedding product and service imaginable. You'll find everything from wedding invitations, wedding keepsakes and wedding favors to online bridal gift registries, travel agencies for destination weddings and honeymoons, wedding consulting services and much more. To ensure that you can recognize and hire or purchase from qualified wedding vendors, the key is to be aware of a few general guidelines.
Wedding Dresses - What To Wear
You have begun to plan your wedding and you want your wedding to be special and unique to your and your future spouse. There are traditions and superstitions that have grown around the wedding ceremony, the bride, and what the bride wears in particular. Let's take a look at some of them.
What Is A Destination Wedding Favor?
Have you heard of destination wedding favors? I haven't either, so, I have taken it upon myself to pioneer this phrase. Destination weddings, destination wedding dresses, and now, "destination wedding favors". I like it!
Celtic Diamond Rings ? A Combination of History And Romance
The symbolism of Celtic Diamond Rings is relevant to all cultures. Love and friendship intertwined in the Celtic symbols on the ring have relevance to every couple contemplating marriage. The ancient Celts used the symbols of the Claddagh to show that marriage is a partnership where love prevails throughout any hardship. The Celtic Daimond Rings are well-known for the symbol of a heart with two crowns, both cradled by linked hands.
Fun Dating Ideas to Spice up Your Marriage
One of the best benefits of marriage is that you have a permanent dating partner. Don't let the fun end after the honeymoon. Here are some ideas for fun dates.
A Wedding Shower Invitation Should Be Attractive And Stylish!
Wedding shower invitations should lay out all of the necessary information, yet still be attractive. One way to do this is to have a picture engraved on the invitation. Ask your engraver to add a small design on the inside of your invitation or wherever you have information about the reception. If, for example, an ice cream social is your theme see if there is an ice cream cone or Sundae dish they can emboss onto the paper without taking away from the main body of the invitation. Remember that subtlety is stylish; you don't want to come across as overpowering with your theme.
Like Sand Through an Hour Glass
Symbols! Weddings are full of them. Exchanging rings. Exchanging roses. Tying hands with ribbons. Merging coloured sands. Lighting candles. Releasing doves or butterflies. Ringing bells and kissing chimney sweeps. But when it comes to real drama, no symbol can match smashing a glass or two.
Wedding Anniversary Symbols
Most people are aware that significant wedding anniversaries such as 25th and 40th are linked to precious stones, in these cases silver and ruby. However, it is less well known that all anniversaries up to and including the 15th, and then every 5th anniversary, have their own particular symbol. The list below shows the symbol traditionally associated with each anniversary.
Choosing your Wedding Favors
How do you give thanks and make a lasting impression on your guest? The answer is simple, with a wedding favor. A wedding favor is a small token of appreciation for your guest to treasure and remember your special wedding day. Choosing the right wedding favor should represent both the bride and groom's personal style or personality, culture and your wedding theme. Many wedding books and planners suggest ordering your favors at least two months prior to your wedding day.
According to the Encarta Dictionary, love is an intense feeling of tender affection and compassion; a passionate feeling or romantic desire and sexual attraction. Erich Fromm made these comments:
Arizona Wedding Reception
The Arizona Inn is just the place that you are looking for if you seeking for neat and well-cared for lawns and trees combined with lush gardens and a serene view. Apart from that, this inn is also filled with fragrances of roses and oranges as well as eye-catching fountains. There is no doubt on the exquisiteness of the Arizona Inn, having won numerous hotel awards in addition to being a host to many of Arizona's best wedding receptions. In fact, its prestige extends to being named one of the top 50 small hotels in the US based on the Zagat survey. In this venue, you can definitely plan for a romantic wedding reception as their reception halls are uniquely designed with French doors, antiques and high-beamed ceilings. This is the reason why your wedding reception at the Arizona Inn will be an event that will never be forgotten.
Las Vegas Wedding Receptions
Las Vegas wedding receptions are where people tend to go absolutely wild. For most people, the ceremony is not where the real action is. The real action begins at the party that follows the ceremony ? and the two don't have to be held in the same place. You can have a traditional wedding ceremony at a chapel, at the County Clerk's Office or anywhere you choose and then you can have a party for as many people as you'd like anywhere else in town.
Weddings Las Vegas: Popular Ceremonies
Are you looking for a las Vegas chapel to make your wedding dreams come true? Chances are you will find it here with Weddings Las Vegas and its many exciting options and packages to choose from. From a simple ceremony in your hotel room to a lavish affair at one of these dynamic locations, your exchange of vows will become permanently etched in the memories of everyone present as a thing of beauty that lasts forever.
New Trends for Wedding Favors 2005
Wedding favors have evolved over time. Wedding favors today combine the traditional with the modern and elegant design with great functionality. Here are some of the hot new trends in wedding favors:
Should You Wear White?
White is traditionally a symbol of purity and as it was, traditionally, every mans wish to marry a pure woman to be married in white was a sign that you were indeed pure and a "good catch".
Ten Tips for Writing Your Perfect Wedding Vows
1. Start with a nice clean piece of paper (lavender is good, but any kind will work). Down the left side of the page, write the numbers 1-10. Now ? without stopping to think about it, fill in this page! Write down the first 10 things that come to mind in response to this sentence: "I love (my partner's name) because . . . " Set this piece of paper aside.
For Second Weddings Only - Eight Tips
Planning a second wedding? Prevent favorite guests comparing your second wedding, to the first wedding. It isn't tricky but it will take some thought. Whether guests will or will not compare weddings is likely to be determined by the bride's status.
Celtic Wedding Rituals -- Tying the knot
One of the most elegant rituals you can choose for a wedding is the traditional Celtic hand fasting. After the vows, the bride and groom's wrists are bound together with five colored ribbons, each symbolizing an aspect of marriage and their shared commitment. It is a long standing Celtic tradition that is still quite popular, and happens to be the origin of the expression "tying the knot" which has grown to mean getting married. Though this tradition is a lovely and meaningful tradition, many other Celtic wedding traditions have not aged as gracefully.
Las Vegas Elvis Weddings
Got a yen for Elvis? Lots of people do. There are many variations on the theme ? and each and every one of them is available in Las Vegas and only in Las Vegas.
Anniversary Gifts and Perfumes
How many times has your anniversary come around and you quickly rush out to buy something, anything from a myriad of anniversary gifts and perfumes available.
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